Palliative Care

This past week I started my new rotation, Palliative Care.  Oh lordy....when people hear "palliative care" in the hospital, they immediately think they're going to die.  And while this is true on occasion, palliative care docs do whole lot more than give morphine and hand out Kleenex.

Palliative care is a phenomenal service.  This team is consulted for a variety of situations; to help patients figure out what their goals of care are, to help primary medical teams determine if a patient has the capacity to make decisions regarding their medical care, to help with symptom management, and to assist with the dying process - whether that be helping a family cope or keeping a patient comfortable - often both. 

That being said, it is a very emotionally demanding job.  In the past week, I've stood with a family, gathered around their loved one, with tears in their eyes, holding onto frail hands, saying their last "I love you's."  I've heard husbands say, "I just don't want to see her suffer anymore."  I've counseled scared siblings asking if their brother was going to be in pain when he passed.  I've had to hold back tears watching a father gaze across the room at his young son, now nearly brain dead after a severe trauma.  I've stroked a cold, thin hand and said, "It's okay....just rest."  I've stood by the bed of a patient and wondered if she knew she was dying alone.  I've wondered what it would be like for Danny if he had to bring our sweet baby girl home from the hospital without me. 

It's been a hard week.  But it's been a good week.  I think this is something I could see myself doing.

*again, situations have been altered to adhere to HIPAA*