We had lunch with some friends this afternoon and I had offered to bring dessert. I was going to make old faithful - chocolate chip cookies, then I considered strawberry shortcake (thanks for the suggestion Humble Hostess!). And then, for reasons yet to be understood, I decided to make mulberry pie.
What is a mulberry, you ask?
Why, I have no idea, I say.
Alls I know is that we have two giant mulberry trees in our yard that leave a purple mess on our driveway every spring. And the birds love the berries....I've seen the purple poop! Ha Ha....purple poop! [Insert favorite K-State joke here.]
So I decided to use the resources in our front yard and make a pie. I put Danny in charge of the picking. He put me in charge of everything else. Including the homemade crust. How we all lived and thrived without Google for so many years is a mystery I ponder daily.
The following is a how to regarding mulberry pie.....
1. Move into a house surrounded by mulberry trees.
2. Find yourself a husband to go out and pick them. Ideally, he will be tall with a large wing span. He should also have broad shoulders and a kind heart. And a nice tush.
3. Have a baby that can watch out the window as her daddy picks berries.
Then when she sees him.....
4. I'm sorry, what was I talking about....?
5. Rinse the mulberries in cool water. I'm just guessing on this one. Not part of the actual recipe, but it just sounded like a good idea.
6. Google "how to make pie crust." Then fill said pie crust with berries smooshed together with flour and sugar.
7. If you're feeling especially daring, you can also google "how to make lattice pie crust." Find instructions with pictures.
9. Take some xanax.
10. Feel really good about yourself when you figure out how to lattice. Say something like, "What's up now!?!?" or "Who's your daddy?!?!"
11. Have a melt down when you realize that you messed up one of the strands of lattice work.
12. Feel better after your husband suggests that you repeat the same mistake on all of your pies as your special "signature." Kind of like a serial killer.
13. Bake.
14. While the pie is in the oven, take pictures of your baby's chubby thighs. Wish that your chubby thighs were as cute as hers.
15. Remove from oven. Take lots of pictures of your pie. In the event that you never make pie again, you'll have proof that once upon a time....you made pie.
16. Do like they do in the old folks home and wipe your drool.
17. Repeat step 16.
18. Slice. Plop some vanilla ice cream down next to your pie.
19. Eat
Posts
2 comments:
no update on what it tasted like??
Kate...it was fantastic! You'll have to have some when you get home. I'm thinking about having a mulberry party every spring!
Post a Comment